You Can’t Kill Your Ego: Love Her Instead

Well, the text bellow caught my attention on one of the FB groups I frequent, and it definitely merits to be re-posted here at the Integral Life Blog.

I have written extensively about the ego and how to relate to it in a nonviolent way, see the Blog series here (Embracing the Ego first part >>, second part >> and third part  >>).

 

 

So here we go:

You Can’t Kill Your Ego: Love Her Instead

There’s all this talk about killing off the ego, as if the same intelligence that holds up the sun and spins the earth made a mistake in giving humans an individuated sense of self, as if this sense somehow precludes our capacity to understand the interconnectedness of all things.

You cannot kill your ego, and any attempt to do so is, ironic as it sounds, an ego trick. Contrary to “consciousness propaganda” your ego is not a mistake made by nature that you must undo with your spirit breath.

If your ego mind, your conscious mind, your personality is somehow circumventing your happiness it is because it is unhealthy. Egos get sick. Installing a new age guru in your head isn’t going to heal your ego.

Panicking over the laws of magnetic resonance (LOA) because your unwell ego is chattering through its illness (the only way it can ask for help) because you fear it will bring destruction upon your house is counter-productive.

Your brain is an evolutionary masterpiece. Mind, while limited, is far from useless, innately bad, or even specifically obstructive. Your subconscious is a living library that remembers all the stories of the universe, especially the ones that are a part of you.

If you stop treating your ego like your enemy, and start dealing with all the negativity in your mind with compassion and non-resistance, with reasonableness, logic and deep, abiding love, she will start to heal.

As your ego slowly and gently is lead to health and wellness, you will begin to realize that she has always been your ally. She only wanted to keep you safe from disappointment, rejection, and other harm caused by other sick egos. She was only trying to ward off the forces that injure the mind.

As a result, she has been injured, she has caught the disease she’d spent all your life trying to ward off. Ineffective quarantine and hatred pointed inward keeps you from moving on. Without her you would never be able to manoeuver your physical life into alignment with the life that makes your heart sing.

Your ego is not stopping you. She is serving you the best way she can in her crippled state.

Nursing her back to health is a long-term commitment. It doesn’t matter if you live in a culture of throw-away things; this, you cannot escape. This, you may not discard.

You have two choices: live with your suffering, or treat the disease. The process of healing is hard labour, but it is labour that goes someplace new. Living with a sick ego is also hard labour, but it never gets easier, and you never relocate. Instead, your heart stays in quiet yearning and the life you dream of remains impossible to align with.

Instead of trying to withhold happiness and love from yourself based on an impossible demand (i.e. You may have the money, love, freedom that will make you happy if you will just shape up and stop having a broken bone, diabetes, cancer…) you could instead allow the chaos, apply the medicine, hold her while she wails and start becoming true again.

Let your ego express her grief, her rage, her terror about the exile, the torture, the abuse, the invisibility and the lack of appreciative acknowledgement that rendered her a foe, when all she wanted to do is serve you, your heart, your life and your mission. Hold her like a wailing child in your arms. She has survived a war and lost it all. Her mother: your heart, has been removed from her reality, and she grieves while her mother seeks the innocent child, the victim of circumstance left behind.

Let not the suffering your ego manages for you be in vain.

As you resurrect her in your arms, as her true nature emerges you will see how much you have lost, and you will grieve because it was your own blindness that has allowed this to happen. At the same time, your compassion practice will remind you that much of this distortion was unavoidable, and the holy moment when you start to love your ego will transform you.

As your ego begins to get healthy, you will become more yourself. That which is untrue may not come to the temple door, for it has no offering to lay upon the altar.

You need access to the truer, personal self because only you may knock upon the door of your own Divinity. The programs in you, the secret monsters, the voices of your governments, tribe and culture have no life in you but that which you are giving them, and these elements are the swine to which divine pearls may not be thrown .

It is not the ego itself that is the problem. It is a sickness that comes from ignorance of our authentic selves made manifest that we might see with true eyes. You don’t need to kill your ego. Make it healthy and you will see it’s purpose. You will remember that you were created perfectly. There has been no mistake. Yes, even your {gasp!} ego serves the One Love, but it cannot serve when it is sick.

~Alison Nappi

Potencial sistema AK

V tem blogu bi rad z vami podelil določene izkušnje s sistemom Avtentične oz Nenasilne komunikacije, sistema oz še bolje rečeno Umetnosti življenja, ki jo je utemeljil Dr. Marshall Rosenberg.

V življenju sta mi namreč napredek in smisel izredno dragocena in izražanje glede ogromnega potenciala umetnosti Življenja Nenasilne komunikacije mi res dobro dene.

OK. :)

Najprej bi rad razmejil dva pojma: razumevanje na eni in transformacijo na drugi strani.

Pomagal si bom s sledečo analogijo:
recept sestavin pice, postopek priprave testa, nadeva, primerna temperatura in trajanje peke – vse to sodi, v temu kontekstu, pod razumevanje teorije in zahteva uporabo kapacitete intelekta.
In razumevanje teorije, logika in intelekt  – vse to ima lahko seveda svoj draž in pozitivne lastnosti.

In še tako dodelan recept, še tako popolno razumevanje in obvladovanje teorije se, v tem kontekstu, kar precej težko kosa z okušanjem tople, sočne, hrustljave in res okusne pice.

Kako se vam to sliši? :)

Transformacija, po drugi strani (in v tem kontekstu) v primerjavi z razumevanjem, pa je proces, skozi katerega grem recimo sam, ko uživam res okusno pico. Transformacija stanja pred in po uživanju. Po uživanju pice sem bolj zadovoljen, sit.

Nekaj zelo podobnega sam zaznavam pri razumevanju principov NVC-ja in uporabi teh principov, ki lahko vodijo v transformacijo.

V bistvu govorim o potencialu povsem osnovnih principov NVC-ja, ki mi (morda tudi vam) lahko dejansko pomagajo pri transformaciji. Transformaciji.

Transformaciji česa?

Ne vem. Prav natančnega oz pravilnega odgovora na to vprašanje nimam. Kar pa izredno dobro poznam pa je proces transformacije, ki me je ogromno doprinesel k mojemu miru, jasnosti in sproščenosti v srcu in v odnosih s strankami, prijatelji in mojo hčerkico. Proces transformacije moje relativne odtujenosti od lastnih občutkov, ne-zavedanja lastnih hrepenenj v srcu in več ali manj razdiralnega načina komunikacije z drugimi.

Sedaj mi na misel prihajajo besede enega od trenerjev NVC-ja, g. Roberta Gonzalesa, katere sem prebral na FB. Robert pravi, da mu je predstavljal sam sistem NVC-ja na začetku velik izziv, kljub poznavanju filozofije, psihologije in kljub dolgoletni praksi meditacije.

Tudi moja realnost je bila kar precej podobna njegovi. Ko sem prvič prišel v stik s principi NVC-ja (jasno definirani občutki, potrebe, razlike med strategijami ter potrebami in razlike med občutki in potrebami, recimo) sem imel za seboj pribl. 15 let vodenja humanistične psihoterapije in vsaj 20 let posvečenega dela na sebi s pomočjo yoge (kriya, mantra, hatha), meditacije (zen, vipassana), Tantre in seveda poznavanja Vedske književnosti, zahodnjaške ezoterike ter kognitivne, humanistične ter transpersonalne psihologije.

In kljub vsem tem izkušnjam in znanju mi je sam sistem NVC-ja predstavljal res velik izziv. Izziv ne na nivoju razumevanja, temveč uporabnosti in prakse v vsakdanjem življenju.

Obvladovanje Umetnosti življenja, kot NVC-ju rad rečem včasih sam, dejansko zahteva posvečenost, iskrenost do sebe, vlaganje truda in energije in seveda soočanje s svojimi lastnimi disharmonijami (potlačena čustva, vzorci vedenja, prepričanja oz stališča glede sebe, sveta in drugih, obrambni mehanizmi, taktike bežanja pred prevzemanjem odgovornosti itd…) in samo razumevanje principov in morda par vikend seminarjev na leto enostavno ne zaleže tako, kot bi si morda želeli.

Hmm.
Sam obiskujem NVC seminarje v tujini in tudi pri nas zadnja štiri leta in na teh seminarjih sem se res ogromno naučil. NVC je zame dejansko močan močan sistem doseganja in ohranjanja avtentičnosti in s tem harmonije s samim seboj in drugimi.

Opažam, da se precej NVC trenerjev in tudi ostalih praktikantov tega sistema posveča socialnim spremembam. Želijo (če prav razumem, seveda, lahko se motim), da se NVC razširi in integrira v izobraževalne sisteme, v šole, v vrtce, v poslovne sfere itd… Tudi iz mojega vidika bi NVC recimo v šolskem sistemu res ogromno doprinesel k večji harmoniji odnosov: spremenimo sistem in vsem bo lepše.

No, moja realnost pa je malce drugačna. Sam ne dajem poudarka na socialne spremembe temveč na spremembe in napredek v življenju posameznikov.
Da, lepo bi bilo imeti sistem kot je NVC v uradnem šolskem sistemu, in vendarle NVC vsebuje, iz mojega vidika, še mnogo mnogo mnogo mnogo večji potencial.

Potencial za osebni razvoj, za preseganje omejitev v osebnem in celo intimnem življenju. Nudi informacije in predvsem tehnike, ki omogočajo poglabljanje zavedanja, preseganje lastnih samo-ustvarjenih omejitev in predvsem načine, kako varno in v lastnem ritmu napredovati v smeri večje izpolnjenosti in zadovoljstva ter jasnosti in miru v osebnem življenju, tukaj in sedaj, ne glede na razmere v socialni klimi.

In to zahteva posvečenost, iskrenost in voljnost soočanja in preseganja svoji lastnih notranjih disharmonij, in spet, ne glede na razmere v raznih sistemih naše družbe.

Transformacija. Meni je dragocen napredek na individualni ravni, transformacija odnosa najprej do sebe, do svojih otrok in staršev. Napredek najprej v notranjih psihični dinamiki, in šele nato napredek v družbi in realizacija socialnih sprememb.

Kako naj dosežemo socialne spremembe, če še sami nismo res srečni, izpolnjeni in zadovoljni v prvi vrsti sami s seboj?

No, kakor koli že, kljub želji po socialnih spremembah, je v meni izredno živo hrepenenje po spremembi najprej na nivoju posameznikov, in v tem okviru sem sestavil šest mesečno šolo nenasilne komunikacije, kjer je poudarek najprej na osebnem razvoju in napredku v dojemanju sebe.

Podrobnosti o šoli Avtentične oz nenasilne komunikacije na naši novi spletni strani, zirafica.si, tukaj >>

 

Childhood is NOT a mental disorder

Thus far I have refrained from posting content about the psychiatry on this Blog, but the two videos below nail it completely, in my honest opinion.
If general public only knew the true story behind psychiatry…
Oh well.

V preteklosti sem se na tem Blogu namenoma izogibal objavljanju vsebine glede psihiatrije ampak dva videa spodaj pa sta res zadetek v črno, iz mojega vidika.
Ko bi širša javnost vsaj vedela kaj se v resnici dogaja v psihiatriji…
Hja no.

 

Labeling Kids with Bogus ‘Mental Disorders’

 

Medtem, ko smo odrasli sami odgovorni za nevednost oz ignoranco (glede resnice o psihiatričnih drogah), naši otročki pač niso.
Prosim, prebudite se iz iluzij in prenehajte zastrupljati svoje otroke.

While adults are responsible for our own ignorance (regarding true facts behind psychiatric drugs), our children on the other hand, are not.
Please, stop deluding yourself about psychiatric drugs and stop poisoning your kids.

 Drugging kinds – side effects

 

;(

Spisek potreb in občutkov

V tem blogu objavljam spiske nekaterih potreb oz notranjih kvalitet ter občutkov po modelu Dr. Marshall Rosenberga in njegovega sistema nenasilne komunikacije.

Moje opažanje namreč je (predvsem na podlagi pogovorov), da kar precej posameznikov, s katerimi se srečujem bodisi v seansah psihoterapije ali na seminarjih, enostavno nima stika s širino in globino svojega notranjega Življenja v obliki potreb in občutkov.

No, moja namera s tem blogom je, da morda doprinesem k poglabljanju razumevanja te tematike vsem vam, ki berete te besede.

Zelo na kratko:
v humanistični psihologiji na splošno in še posebej v umetnosti življenja Nenasilne komunikacije velja dejstvo, da so občutki (bodisi pozitivni ali negativni) VEDNO zgolj posledica izpolnjenih ali neizpolnjenih potreb v nas samih.

Potrebe v tem kontekstu zajemajo tiste notranje in povsem subjektivne lastnosti in hrepenenja, ki so nam vsem precej (ne)poznana. Recimo varnost, stik, bližina in mir.

Kadar te potrebe NISO aktualizirane oz živete oz zadovoljene, občutimo negativna čustvena stanja, kot so jeza, nemir, žalost, osamljenost itd…

Ko pa so te potrebe in hrepenenja res izražena in zadovoljena, občutimo pozitivna čustvena stanja, kot so sreča, veselje, zadovoljstvo, radost, hvaležnost itd…

Več o nenasilni komunikaciji in naši šest mesečni šoli le-te
na novi spletni strani Žirafica.si >>

Hvala vam za vaš čas.

Here we go:

Spisek potreb

Spisek spodaj je seveda zgolj okvirna informacija glede nekaterih notranjih potencialov oz potreb, ki so lahko nam vsem skupne in nikakor ni dokončen ali popoln.

Vsekakor je lahko zaznavanje in izražanje teh in drugih notranjih kvalitet povsem subjektivno. Vabim vas, da zavedanje teh potencialov oz potreb raziščete sami.

 

Spoštovanje Sprejemanje Bližina Pripadnost Varnost
Poštenost Ljubezen Gotovost Zaupanje Razumevanje
Toplina Lepota Harmonija Skladnost Radost
Veselje Zdravje Navdih Red Mir
Svoboda Izražanje Izbira Stik Življenje
Napredek Pristnost Prisotnost Smisel Ustvarjalnost
Opora Vživljanje Empatija Samo-empatija Samostojnost
Praznovanje Žalovanje Ranljivost Modrost Moč
Vedrina Lahkotnost Znanje Védenje Duhovnost
Pogum Enakopravnost Integriteta Dostojanstvo Iskrenost
Zvestoba Individualnost Dajanje Prejemanje Vzajemnost
Sodelovanje Cenjenje Skupnost Konsistentnost Vključenost
Razvedrilo Stabilnost Vidnost Zavedanje Dobrobit (fizična)
Doprinos Izraznost (intimna) Humor Igrivost Živost
Skrb Raziskovanje Neodvisnost Spontanost Izziv
Jasnost Kompetentnost Učinkovitost Rast Upanje
Realnost Enakovrednost Namen Avtonomnost Suverenost
Intimnost Priznavanje Intuitivnost Enost Blaženost

 

Spisek občutkov
ko potrebe NISO zadovoljene

Občutki in čustvena stanja navedena spodaj so (lahko) posledica neizpolnjenih potreb oz ne zavedanja in ne izražanja notranjih potencialov.

Spisek seveda ni dokončen ali popoln. Zaznavanje občutkov je seveda subjektivno in zato vas vabim,
da sami raziščete svoje občutke v srcu.

Strah Zmedenost Dvom Jeza Žalost
Sovraštvo Bes Osamljenost Zaskrbljenost Izgubljenost
Razdvojenost Samost Hladnost Brezbrižnost Depresija
Sram Krivda Šokantnost Razočaranje Morbidnost
Utrujenost Praznina Pomanjkanje Živčnost Nemir
Razdraženost Neučakanost Bolečina Anksioznost Nenavezanost
Opustošenost Razvrednotenost Manjvrednost Nemoč Odtujenost
Ne-varnost Ranljivost Ničnost Neobstojnost Ljubosumje
Obup Nesreča Brezupnost Vznemirjenost Umazanost

 

Spisek občutkov
ko potrebe SO zadovoljene

Občutki in čustvena stanja navedena spodaj so (lahko) posledica izpolnjenih potreb oz izražanja notranjih potencialov.

Spisek vsekakor ni dokončen ali popoln. Zaznavanje občutkov je seveda subjektivno in zato vas vabim, da sami raziščete svoje občutke v srcu.

Sreča Radost Evforija Izpolnjenost Varnost
Zadovoljstvo Ljubezen Mir Odprtost Zaupanje
Toplina Pripadnost Navdušenost Hvaležnost Radost
Veselje Nežnost Mehkoba Blaženost Čarobnost
Svoboda Praznovanje Vedrina Neobremenjenost Enakopravnost
Razvedrilo Stabilnost Vključenost Igrivost Spontanost
Neodvisnost Enakovrednost Pozitivnost Optimizem Sproščenost
Razbremenjenost Lahkotnost Odprtost Začudenost Hvaležnost
Ponos Moč Energičnost Budnost Strast
Vzburjenost Razburjenost Milina Presenečenost Navdihnjenost
Ekstatičnost Udobje Ponos Zaupanje Enost
Povezanost Spočitost Umirjenost Živost Uživanje

 

Več o nenasilni komunikaciji in šest mesečni šoli le-te na novi spletni strani Žirafica.si >>

Audio blog: Intenziv Razsvetljenja

Prvi Integral Life Audio Blog:
Intenziva Razsvetljenja

Dolžina: 17 min
Format: MP3, Bit rate 192, 23.3 MB

 

V primeru, da zgornji player ne funkcionira, izvolite Dropbox downloand, tukaj >>

Dodatne info:
Informacjie in prijave na aprilski Intenziv Razsvetljenja >>
(odpre se nova stran)

Dr John Rowan on Authenticity

Dr John RowanAuthenticity is the natural expression of having made the move from first-tier consciousness – what Ken Wilber calls Mental Ego consciousness, and what is often called conventional consciousness – to second-tier consciousness, or what Wilber calls Centaur consciousness, and which is often called post-conventional consciousness.

This is quite a normal and natural progression, but it often results from a crisis of some kind, which shakes us out of the comforts of conventional consciousness.

First tier consciousness is dominated by formal logic, based on the premise that A is A. This is the logic often taught in schools, and it has been named variously as Aristotelian, Newtonian, Cartesian, Boolean and mathematical logic. It is used very successfully in computers, and is highly suitable for working with inanimate things.

Second tier consciousness is dominated by dialectical logic, the logic of paradox and contradiction, whose basic premise is that A is not simply A. This is the logic we require for dealing adequately with human beings. And it is only if we embrace this form of logic that we can understand authenticity.

Authenticity is fully embodied in most of the forms of humanistic psychotherapy, including Person-centred, Gestalt, Psychodrama, experiential therapies, Primal Integration, radical therapy, feminist therapy, several body therapies, dream work and so forth. They are very much at home there, contributing essentially to the humanistic emphasis on the whole person and the authentic relationship. The humanistic view of authenticity is broader and more inclusive than that to be found in existential analysis.

James Bugental has written two books about authenticity. He says that authenticity is a combination of self respect (we are not just part of an undifferentiated world) and self enactment – we express our care or involvement in the world in a visible way.

Here is a key quotation:
“By authenticity I mean a central genuineness and awareness of being. Authenticity is that presence of an individual in his living in which he is fully aware in the present moment, in the present situation. Authenticity is difficult to convey in words, but experientially it is readily perceived in ourselves or in others.” (Bugental 1981, p.102)
In other words, what we in humanistic psychology are saying is that authenticity is an experience.

As Rollo May has said so well: “Freedom is a quality of action of the centered self.” (May 1979, p.176) Ž
The humanistic view is that action is the acid test of experience.

What it seems so hard to convey to many people is that the real self, the self which is to be actualized in self-actualization, is not a concept but an experience. It is not something to be argued at a philosophical level, it is something to be encountered at an experiential level. Otherwise it becomes an abstract and useless concept.

Some existentialists embrace this, as for example here:
Authenticity consists in having a true and lucid consciousness of the situation, in assuming the responsibilities and risks that it involves, in accepting it in pride or humiliation, sometimes in horror and hate. There is no doubt that authenticity demands much courage and more than courage. Thus it is not surprising that one finds it so rarely.
(Sartre 1948, p.90)

It demands so much because it involves moving beyond the confines of the familiar mental ego. To get away from the abstract argument, let us take a concrete example.

It comes from a book by Allen Wheelis, and it goes like this:

Look at the wretched people huddled in line for the gas chambers at Auschwitz. If they do anything other than move on quietly, they will be clubbed down. Where is freedom?… But wait. Go back in time, enter the actual event, the very moment: they are thin and weak, and they smell; hear the weary shuffling steps, the anguished catch of breath, the clutch of hand. Enter now the head of one hunched and limping man.

The line moves slowly; a few yards ahead begin the steps down. He sees the sign, someone whispers “showers”, but he knows what happens here. He is struggling with a choice: to shout “Comrades! They will kill you! Run!” – or to say nothing. This option, in the few moments remaining, is his whole life. If he shouts he dies now, painfully; if he moves on silently he dies but minutes later. Looking back on him in time and memory, we find the moment poignant but the freedom negligible. It makes no difference in that situation, his election of daring or of inhibition.

Both are futile, without consequence. History sees no freedom for him, notes only constraint, labels him victim. But in the consciousness of that one man it makes great difference whether or not he experiences the choice. For if he knows the constraint and nothing else, if he thinks “Nothing is possible”, then he is living his necessity; but if, perceiving the constraint, he turns from it to a choice between two possible courses of action, then – however he chooses – he is living his freedom.
This commitment to freedom can extend to the last breath. ”
(Wheelis 1973, ‘How People Change’, pp.31-32)

For humanistic psychotherapy, authenticity is a direct experience of the real self. It is unmistakable, it is self-authenticating. And if we want to know how to use it on a daily basis, we can go to the excellent book by Will Schutz entitled ‘Profound Simplicity’ (3rd edition 1988).

There is an important link between authenticity and genuineness as described by Carl Rogers.

“It is my feeling that congruence is a part of existential authenticity, that the person who is genuinely authentic in his being-in-the-world is congruent within himself; and to the extent that one attains authentic being in his life, to that extent is he congruent.”
(Bugental 1981, p.108)

Again it takes Bugental to draw our attention to the heartland of the humanistic approach, which is also the heartland of the existential approach. Both Bugental and Rogers are clear that congruence is difficult and demanding, and recent writers like Dave Mearns have made it clear that it cannot be taught as a skill.

As authentic beings, we recognize our individuality.
Further, we recognize that this individuality is not a static quality but is, rather, a set of (possibly infinite) potentialities. As such, while in the authentic mode, we maintain an independence of thought and action, and subsequently feel ‘in charge’ of the way our life is experienced. Rather than reacting as victims to the vicissitudes of being, we, as authentic beings, acknowledge our role in determining our actions, thought and beliefs, and thereby experience a stronger and fuller sense of integration, acceptance, ‘openness’ and ‘aliveness’ to the potentialities of being-in-the-world.
(Spinelli 1989, p.109)

I couldn’t have put it better myself.

– Dr John Rowan
Text re-posted from:
www.johnrowan.co.uk

Nobody can hurt you without your permission

And so I am more in contact with the humanistic world view for the last few weeks, joyfully attending and sharing NVC seminars.

The upcoming weekend I will share a seminar “Exploring the power of self-empathy”. The concept and empirical skill of self-empathy is the most important element of the whole NVC art of living, in my experience…

…and so in this blog I would like to share a few thoughts on the subject.

So, my idea (and indeed experience) is that no one can really hurt you (or me) without you (or me) somehow allowing it.
It is a delicate subject, I think, so lets tread gently.

Let us first take a look at the scientific facts. Biological psychology and neurobiology affirm that the life as we know it actually takes place between our ears, not out there. Yeah, holy sh*t! :)
It is the brain that interprets the sensor input and so the perception is thus inevitably (and always) subjective. I have spent almost three years studying that exact fact (I wrote a paper on the subject and then some, check it out here >>, new page opens up). Interesting stuff, to say the least.

If interested, do look into the work of Dr. Benjamin Libet; lots and lots of mind boggling research results there. Also, these volumes were of great help to me, maybe they might add to your clarity of the subject as well:
– Fundamentals of Cognitive Psychology, by Ronald T. Kellogg,
– The Student’s Guide to Cognitive Neuroscience, 2nd edition, Jamie Ward and
– Understanding Biological Psychology, Philip J. Corr.
All titles can be bought at Amazon.

And so the hard core science, neurobiology and cognitive neuroscience, affirms that we all live our lives based on interpretations of what we perceive as “out there”. Well, wonderful.

What has that got to do with self-empathy and the Mahatma Gandhi’s statement “Nobody can hurt you without your permission.”?

Well, here comes the tricky part:

No one can DIRECTLY cause your inner pain or happiness (or any other emotional or mental event). Let me say this again: I can not possibly DIRECTLY cause your pain / happiness. Even more: even if I tried really hard, I could not do it, not without your “help”.

You see, the perception (one of rather important cognitive processes) is always subjective, meaning that it depends on the subject, you (or me). If we try to follow this line of thought to the conclusion, where does it take us?

Maybe here:

The pain, happiness (or any other emotional or mental event) is unavoidably subjective and is happening in you alone, and moreover, it is experienced only by you, independently of ambient stuff. And your experience of some “outside” event might be that of slight pain or maybe indifference or even happiness.

Yes?

So, how is it than possible for your wife, husband, child, parent, boyfriend, girlfriend, boss, postman, police officer etc. to hurt you?
No really, I am asking you this now.

It is not possible. It is a neurological impossibility. It is just not possible in reality.

Seems to me that Mahatma Gandhi understood this neurological fact, he said: “Nobody can hurt you without your permission.”

What is the trick here?

It is up to me how I perceive and experience the “outside” events. It is me. Always me. I am allowing something to influence my inner psychological climate in a way that results in pain or sorrow or frustration or anger.
It is not on the outside.

And here comes the wonderful self-empathy to the rescue, like a knight on a white horse in shining (read: gently and lovingly offering help) armor.

If a certain person triggers me, meaning that I react with emotions that are not really pleasing me, it only indicates that I have lost conscious connection with my inner deeper reality which is the only real cause of all kinds of emotions.

If something or someone is influencing you in a way that is displeasing to you, it only shows that your inner psychological climate is under stress, as it were. And it happens so fast that your conscious mind simply notices it not.

So what to do?

Well, Marshall Rosenberg has said it many many times: slow down, relax, breathe. Give yourself a break and take a huge dose of self-empathy.

When my batteries are full, when my capacity for self-empathy and contact with my inner unlimited potentials is fully actualized, well, all is well. In that state, it is very difficult or even impossible for me to even conceive of others trying to hurt me.

And when the said capacity is not present (which happens often, I admit), well, in such situations I actually give my power away, I literally allow “outside” events to hurt me.

And this awareness, this knowledge is so precious to me. It is like a soft and thick woolen blanket, rendering me open, vulnerable (not as a victim) and willing to participate in Life fully.

What about you?
Are you giving your power away to others?

 

Intenziv Razsvetljenja, april 2015

So vam ta vprašanja morda znana:

»Kdo sem in kaj pravzaprav delam tukaj?«
»Ali v življenju sploh obstaja nek višji smisel?«
»Ali obstaja nekaj, čemur bi lahko rekel/a Dokončna Resnica?«
»Je to, kar vidim, čutim, mislim res vse, kar Je?«
»Kaj je to Življenje, Ljubezen?«

Morda hrepenite po odgovorih?

CILJ INTENZIVA JE IZKUSTVO STANJA ZAVESTI (ne torej zgolj intelektualni odgovori), KI LAHKO POTEŠI VSA NAVEDENA VPRAŠANJA.

Ljudje lahko kljub obvladovanju vseh mogočih filozofskih sistemov in novodobnih teorij morda vendarle hrepenijo po pristnih, intimnih in neposrednih izkušnjah. Le-te pa so lahko resnični in trajni vir zadovoljstva in sreče.

Če torej hrepenite tudi vi po lastnih izkušnjah in ste se pripravljeni potruditi za SVOJO LASTNO MODROST IN IZKUSTVENO ZNANJE, potem je Intenziv razsvetljenja kot nalašč za vas!

Podrobnosti:

Kje: Pohorje

Kdaj: 23. – 27. april 2015
Tri dni Intenziva in en dan integracije.
Začnemo v četrtek zvečer, nadaljujemo tri dni z intenzivnim delom in v ponedeljek izvedemo integracijo.

Cena:
250 EUR.
V ceno je vključeno vodenje seminarja, predavanja, individualni razgovori, podpora med in po seminarju, sam seminar in en dan integracije po seminarju, trije topli in dva hladna obroka na dan, štiri nočitve. Možno plačilo na 4 obroke.

Prijave:
prek obrazca spodaj spodaj ali na tel št 031 208 636

Udeležbo si zagotovite z nakazilom 70 EUR na TRR Inštituta Transpersonalne Psihologije, TRR: SI56 6100 0000 9905 502, Banka Del. Hran., BIC HDELSI22, koda za nakazila: SCVE, najkasneje do 20. aprila, s pripisom “Intenziv 2015″.

Po nakazilu pokličite obvezno pokličite na 031 208 636 in preverite ali je nakazilo prispelo.

Zbor:
Dobimo se pred staro lokomotivo na železniški postaji v Mariboru ob 15. uri. Bodite točni. S seboj prinesite obutev in obleko za  deževno vreme ter pribor za osebno higieno in udobna oblačila.

Dodatne informacije:
Na naši spletni strani www.InSamadhi.com ter na tel št 031 208 636

Vabimo vas, da si pred prijavo oz. rezervacijo mesta na tridnevnem Intenzivu Razsvetljenja, preberete vsebino spletne strani InSamadhi.com in se šele nato odločite za udeležbo.

Vabimo vas, da pridite na Intenziv, če ste pripravljeni tri dni res posvečeno delati na sebi, poglabljati zavedanje sebe in drugih in če vas izkušnja Absolutne zavesti res privlači.

Intenziv je lahko prezahteven za psihične bolnike ter za osebe, ki imajo trenutno v življenju hude težave.

Prijava je veljavna samo z nakazilom vsaj 70 EUR na TRR Inštituta Trans. Psih.
ali na PayPal račun, ID info@itp.eu.com (podatki spodaj).

Izpolnite obrazec:

 



Podatki za nakazila:
Inštitut Transpersonalne Psihologije
Vojkova ulica 3, 6210 Sežana
TRR: SI56 6100 0000 9905 502, Banka Del. Hran., BIC HDELSI22, koda za nakazila: SCVE.

Seminarje lahko plačate tudi online prek varnega sistema PayPal.
Naš PayPal ID je: info@itp.eu.com

Za vsako nakazilo prejmete račun v okviru Inštitua Trans. Psih.

ReikiMaster.si darilni bon

Darilni bon v vrednosti 50 eur lahko unovčite za študij katerega koli sistema Reikija spodaj.
Tečaji in iniciacije potekajo v živo ali na daljavo.
Pišite nam (tukaj >>) in Darilni bon vam bomo poslali na email ali vaš poštni naslov

Nudimo vam torej
(kliknite za podrobnosti, odprejo se nove strani):

Reiki Reiki Reiki

:)